Franchise and government work jokes

A new hair salon franchise opened up for business a few doors down from an old independent salon. The independent shop put up a big bold sign which read:

"We give seven dollar hair cuts!"

Not to be outdone, the franchise owner put up a sign:
"WE FIX SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS"

Faster

Three boys are in the school yard bragging of how great their fathers are. The first one says: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".

The second one says: "Ha! You think that`s fast! My father is a hunter. He can
shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".

The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says: "You
two know nothing about fast. My father works for the government. He stops
working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45"!!