The article is titled “Franchisee profits to go up: survey” and while it joins the everyday mass of misleading propaganda designed to attract the least intelligent Australians, it does stand out in that it goes the whole nine yards stating that franchisors want prospects to give credence to some baseless projection of a 30% increase in franchisee profit.

Will the absurdities never end? It is undeniable that the last few years have seen all small business in Australia struggling adding to record bankruptcies, and very much including franchises, so I suppose a 30% profit increase in rollover losses could put many in the black.

If such articles were not attempting to gather up imbeciles then I would expect some qualification that verbal reassurances from franchisors should mean very little and any serious prophecies regarding franchisor performance have little or zero relationship to franchisee performance.

The fourth annual survey of owners and key executives at 101 franchise systems with 20 or more individual units found once again that the franchise sector had outperformed the broader market, as a whole. Franchising.net.au

I just don’t know how a survey of the franchising sector can compare to the broader market without including reliable data from the broader market. But let us not allow honesty to get in the way of casting a broad net for foolish investors. And definitely don’t put data and findings up against a few years where the overall market has been unquestionably lacking in consumer spending and investor confidence.

Many economists are predicting the lull isn’t over and others are suggesting the good times won’t return to previous levels.

At the same time that Sarah Stowe steps boldly in the footsteps of so many others that can write a good story from pig slop we get Griffith University’s Centre For Franchising Excellence chiming in with a declaration that Australia has bagged another 200 new franchise brands over the past two years and at least stating that failing brands might just kill the celebrations.

Given it’s generally the more robust franchises that survived, and the average number of units per franchise actually increased in 2010 suggests it’s likely we’ll see overall growth in the franchise sector once the full research findings are released. Griffith

And again, all of this having nothing to do with franchisee performance and neglecting to mention that franchise brands in Australia are already at four times per capita than the US with similar figures to every other country where franchising exists.

So let the imbeciles step up and if they are lucky they might even undertake the Griffith online induction to franchising, government funded of course, which does absolutley nothing to prepare the novice for the serious franchise due diligence required before potentially, and too often, signing away everything they hold dear.