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Franchising Birthday Parties


RichardSolomon's picture

How About Bowel Flush Out?

Now that we are perceived to be stupid enough to invest in franchises to "assist" morons to have a successful birthday party for little kids, there are surely other previously believed to be normal and ordinary life functions/events that ought to be franchised as well.

I vote for Bowel Flush Out to the next such "industry". I can already list dozens of logo receptive devices that could be adaptible to bowel function celebrations, and the anal retentive will vie fiercely with the anal compulsive to see who can have the most ostentatious bowel movement celebrations.

The pre movement meal, for example can be laced with flatulence aroma therapy foods that can make the movement culturally aromatic as well as regionally appropriate. Anyone who has experienced kim chee, chili, various bean variety flatulence can vouch for the aroma variance potentialities applicable to the Bowel Flush event consultation/assist.

Age group Bowel Flush sub markets present exccellent divisional franchising opportunities, although I am certain that the franchisees would consider that to be encroachment. Older people's bowel habit management includes touches that relate to that far away look they get just before they sense actual peristaltic release, and the grunting is decidedly different amongst the eldely than in the younger population.  

Videographic services would certainly be part of the package. When grandma dies, the disc of her final bowel event can be replayed at her wake/funeral and at each memorial of her passing year after year. And everty kid would just love to have a disc of infantile bowel function scenarios for replay at bridal showers and bachelor parties so that all their friends can be entertained. Inasmuch as some imbeciles film childbirth, why not do it for bowel mmovements? There is so little separation between the two, phycically as well as conceptually.

Obviously this is now only in conception stage, and anyone wanting to get in on the ground floor is invited to contact me for investment opportunities.



Bob Frankman's picture

What Franchises Well?

Which brings up the point --

What are the right kind of activities that franchising works well with - besides hamburgers?


RichardSolomon's picture

That's the big problem, Bob

Everything that can be franchise with any prospect for success over the life of a contract is already being franchised, and each is now grossly overcrowded with knock off, empty, no substance imitators.

There is no other rational explanation for things being called "Industries" that are not industries at all - - like cleaning dog poop outa your yard. Here no one hires anyone to clean out garages. They just have a garage sale and people will buy the crap they want thrown away. What doesn't sell can simply be left out on the driveway and some Katrina evacuee will steal it.  

Richard Solomon

michael webster's picture

Networking Effects

A necessary condition for franchising success is networking effects: roads for QSRs, reservations systems for hotels, backroom centralization of data may also work.

If the sum is not greater than the parts, there is no point.

And don't buy the line the purchasing power or advertising provides the necessary network effects.  Purchasing power or advertising can be had at the level of a co-operative.

Michael Webster PhD LLB

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